Cows

From Wittypedia

"Mooo" goes the cow... or so they say. This phrase, though widely attributed as the mantra of all cowkind, is actually a misquote of the queen cow who, when giving an address to her subjects, actually said "moo" - oh, how the laugh at us!

Cows live in fields... by day, and in intricate underground lairs by night. It is within these tunnels that they gather to plot the downfall of a small gypsy community that once squatted in a field in Belgium leaving behind inedible grass and causing distress to some of their own. Fiercely protective of 'the family' they have been planning the assassassination of the 3 surviving members of the community for years now and are finalising details before operation mooooo can commence.

Cows give of their milk, which is enjoyed by almost everyone and envied by the lactose intolerant. This has lead to baby cows (so called calves) having no source of milk, forcing farmers to employ human wet-nurses to supply the demand - which, in turn, has lead to people going 'ew!'

They are also responsible for cheeses, butter, leather, connect four and late night shopping - all of which remain clouded in mystery.