Fart

From Wittypedia

"Natures sense of humour"

The best way to ensure a daily dose of gas is to consume foods which produce gas when digested and to aid gas production you should gulp large quantities of liquid with and after your food, this will dilute stomach acid and belive, oo, excuse, oooo that was good, belive me - it works.

types of fart

Relying hevily on the bum cheek position (known as ergonomic flatuacnce function), the volume of gas (gasious smellus voluminous), and the rate of expulsion (Doh Re Me So Fart La Te Doh) - Farts are also graded on smell (on the "knockus outus - stealthus extemus" scale).

Practice makes perfect

Perfect bum cheeking with the ergonomic flatuacnce function and tone control certainly make for the funniest farts. Diet control of the knockus outus - stealthus extemus mixxed with the gasious smellus voluminous add to humour and tacktical farting.

Ripples of bum cheeks to open cheek seeping add to the tone, with volume control being adjusted by control of expulsion pressure.

It is possible with the correct diet, eating style and correct Yogic bum cheek oneness to fart anything from Yesterday by The Beatles to Jesus Built My Hotrod by Ministry.

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